Jason Kelce. Photo: Getty Images

Former Philadelphia Eagle Jason Kelce, posted on X (formerly Twitter) on Monday, responding to critics who accused him of hypocrisy over his stance on women having careers when his own wife is a homemaker. Kelce is an ESPN commentator, and elder brother of Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce, perhaps best known for his romantic relationship with Taylor Swift. Jason Kelce could easily have stayed silent when faced with online trolls. Instead, he spoke up, and what he said amounts to a masterclass in handling unfair criticism with thoughtfulness, emotional intelligence, and grace. It’s an example for every business leader, or anyone who’s ever been the target of unfair criticism.

As you likely know, earlier this month, Kansas City Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker gave a commencement speech at Benedictine College that infuriated many people, including some in the audience. He told women in the class of 2024–who’d just gotten college degrees–that they’d been told “diabolical lies” about having careers, and that his wife’s life only truly began when he married her and she “started living her vocation as a wife and as a mother.”

For good measure, he lashed out at LGBTQ people by calling Pride month “the deadly sins sort of Pride that has an entire month dedicated to it.” Many, many people found his comments deeply offensive–including the Benedictine nuns whose order is a founder and sponsor of the college. So did the NFL, which quickly disavowed Butker’s comments and noted that he “gave a speech in his personal capacity,” and that it did not reflect the League’s views.

We don’t have to agree with Butker to value him on the Chiefs.

A few days later, the Chiefs’ head coach Andy Reid and quarterback Patrick Mahomes also spoke up about Butker, but they took a different stance. They each said, basically, that Butker’s opinions were his own affair, that they judged him only on his actions within the team, where he is a highly valued player and a good guy. They said the NFL–like America itself–contains a diversity of opinions, and that’s a beautiful thing.

I have to say, I was a bit disappointed. I think the beauty of diverse opinions ends when someone’s opinion is that other people have fewer rights than they do. I was hoping to hear someone associated with the Chiefs say that. In any case, perhaps because they’re good team players, the Kelce brothers echoed those comments in their weekly podcast.

That could have been the end of it, but some people attacked Jason Kelce on social media. “Your wife is a homemaker. But you can’t support Butker,” wrote one. “And your wife is a homemaker whose home is a mess. Sorry but it is dirty and messy on television. Seems you’re a bit hypocritical.”

“We both keep our home.”

“Responding to this, because I have seen a number of people say it,” he answered. He went on to say that he and Kylie have a partnership. Both parents are responsible for raising the kids, he continued. And then he said something that completely blew my mind: “We both keep our home. It is both our faults it is messy, but such is life with three young children, busy schedules, and neither of us being neat freaks.”

It is both our faults it is messy. Maybe it’s because I grew up in an era when you never saw men do housework, but those eight words seem revolutionary to me. Sure, an enlightened man might “share” in the housework or “help out.” But the assumption underlying those phrases is that ultimately the state of the house is the responsibility of the woman living in it. Even in my own household, where I’m the breadwinner and my husband does all the cooking and most of the chores, it feels to me like our messy house is my fault, and reflects on me. And I suspect–just like Kylie Kelce–I’ll be the one who gets judged for it.

So to see a former NFL player and now TV star who earns millions of dollars a year say that housekeeping is as much his responsibility as his wife’s, and that the messy house is “both our faults” felt like the perfect antidote to the toxicity of Butker’s pronouncements about gender roles, as well as the perfect rejoinder to the anonymous X user who called him hypocritical. Maybe that’s what Kelce meant those words to be.

He also said this: “Our marriage is a partnership, we are equals who are figuring it out on the daily. The only expectation is that we love each other, support one another, and are committed to our family, that comes first.” I can’t think of a classier way to have said it.

There’s a growing audience of Inc.com readers who receive a daily text from me with a self-care or motivational micro-challenge or tip. Often, they text me back and we wind up in a conversation. (Want to learn more? Here’s some information about the texts and a special invitation to a two-month free trial.) Many are entrepreneurs or business leaders and some have told me that they’ve faced unfair criticism and online attacks. It can be hard to stay level-headed in those situations. Jason Kelce just gave a perfect example of how to do it.